Shenaniquazies

No. No no no! I'm completely not interested! What makes a man think that I would possibly, even in the slightest, agree to marry him because he asked my father? I do not know him. I do not know his past, I am not pleased by his present, and I have absolutely no intention to be part of his future. How tacky!

I get it. It's the traditional way. But firstly, I'm seven-freakin-teen. I don't even know what men are yet, nor do I care in the time being. My education is more important to me now than anything (I'm studying to become a teacher, for God's sake! Do you really think I want to pass on a poor work ethic to my future students?) and I have no time for such shenaniquazies*. Besides, I have a very long criteria that I don't think many people will fulfill, so HA.

In other news, I'm back in Egypt visiting my parents for my very short winder break. I'll hopefully be back in four days because, quite frankly, I hate Egypt and cannot open my heart to it (and that's saying something because I'm generally very forgiving and open minded). I miss Kuwait and my small, hard-as-a-rock bed and that corner where I shove my head and *sigh*. I find sleep to be a very fascinating topic. Dreams are also very interesting, because they're usually not what you think they mean. I find it really important to record your dreams because when you look over them after some time, you will most definitely start to see a pattern in the meanings. Usually when I have a fight, I dream of flying. That sort of thing. Also, there's one recurring dream I've had since I was seven years old: I'm dressed as Anne (of Green Gables)and I'm running up someone's kitchen stairs, but there are pots and pans tumbling down the stairs preventing me and my animal companions from climbing. It's frustratingly unconventional, so it's meaningless. I guess I was watching Anne of Green Gables and got hungry. That's all.

In other news, I really have to register for Spring courses when I get back to Kuwait. So many things I have to do! It's burdensome. It's an awful feeling knowing that you have so much to do but such little initiative. I need an epiphany that will make me want to do my projects. Sometimes I hate university, but then I remember how insignificant and small it is in the face of the Hereafter, and then I just laugh it off. Eh, right?

I finally convinced my father to let me get a kitten. She's a two month old Chinese Siamese which I fittingly named Sagua. The catch? She gets to live with my parents instead of me. That's not even Kureiji, it's just ironic suckishness.

*shenaniquazies is quoted from Buthayna Al Refai, aka Bubu.

I Want This!

White

Today my heart has figuratively swollen to a truly massive size. It's been one of those days where I cry for the friends I miss (you especially, Torontonian), the snow I yearn for, the home I long for, the life I desire. I also cry for the hell of crying. I have a day once in a while in which I suggest people back off from me, because the smallest thing will set me off, like a fish or a jacket. Pretty normal, eh?

Last night was my lovely cousin's 24th birthday party. I hired one of my... angsty, drama-plagued friends to play the guitar and sign for us because despite his gloomy back story, his talent is undeniable. He hushed all of us with his unearthly voice and confident hands. After solemn moments of listening to great music, we all threw our ages aside and played musical chairs to the Mario theme! A few people fell on my lap and sat on my feet (and I have bruises to prove it!), and I kept losing to the same pair of cousins. It was all in good fun, though. By the end of the night, the guitarist came up to me and said, 'thank you or showing me something I had never seen before this.' I asked him what he meant, and he replied, 'Family love.' In that moment, I was humbled. I couldn't believe that I was seething at my parents because they won't let me travel, when this guy was pouring his heart out to me because he didn't have any family. How tactless of me! I'm eternally grateful for the beautiful and diverse family I have and I'm happy to know that despite everything, I'll always have them to turn to help me back up.

My Conscience is Totally Buff Right Now

Today was the ultimate sigh of relief day. I'm the kind of person who leaves everything for the absolute last second and sometimes even misses deadlines, so today, I finally got everything out of my way. I finished my term paper aong with 2 other Art History essays, I went back to the gym, I got some shopping done, and I hired a guitarist for my cousin's birhday party. What a relief!

I'm honestly so happy to be almost free. There are a few here's and there's, but don't we all have those? There's always something we're desperate to get out of the way until all we have is death. How angsty of me, I know! Today, I finally finished Titanic for the first time. My cousins were hyping it up and making it seem so huge and epic, when it was really the most depressing crap I've ever laid eyes on. Who the hell wants to watch Leonardo DiCaprio freeze to death? There is more than enough depression in the world, thank you very much. I don't need you to impose your drama onto me. Pft.

Moving onwards, here's a tip for all my AUKer's out there: if you ever need to use the bathroom, there's one in the girl's section of the library behind the computers that's always deserted. It's magic.

'Deck the Halls With Boughs of-' Oh, Shut Up.

We want winter! We want winter! Oh, hello, didn't see you there. I was just picketing outside old lady Summer's embassy. Apparently, she kidnapped Winter and took over all the seasons (for the record- Spring and Fall never existed. They were absorbed while in the womb. Summer is the strongest of all. Winter barely made it out.) Winter is supposed to be snow, cold, Christmas, coughmybirthdaycough, festive moods, reviewing the year, and welcoming in the new one. Winter is a time of frolicking in the snow and toasting before a fire. NOT DANCING IN THE SAND AND ROASTING MARSHMALLOWS ON THE BEACH! This is what I call nonsensicality. It makes no sense! It's like wearing Uggs in the summer. As you can see, I feel very passionately about this topic.


My brother is coming to visit me for the... fourth time this year. Holy crap, I love you and all, sibling, but it's time to let me have a turn! I'm trying to get my parents to let me go to Canada for two weeks in the spring. My brother gets to come here four times, tour Egypt, Kuwait, and Jordan, then return to Canaduh. I, on the other hand, patiently wait until his visits build up then POUNCE on the right opportunity to ask my parents. A no is not necessarily inevitable after I show them my grades, right? Tactics, people. They work.

So my brother and I are pretty similar people. It's almost like we're the same person sometimes. This morning I opened my Politics book, and none other than a glamorous 20 KD note falls out. Literally seconds later, my brother BBMs me that he opened his Stats book and a 20 CD note falls out. Tell me that's not magical! Similarly, we both have the same photo of our parents as our phone backgrounds without planning. We also have the same answers on surveys more often than not. It's cool having some connection with your sibling, even if you're not very close emotionally, it's fun to be close mentally.

Still Alive...

My how unfaithful some bloggers can be! Thank Heavens I'm not like that. I'm very loyal to my blog, and I visit it like a mother visits her new born baby.

Yeah yeah, you have permission to hit me. Truth is, I haven't been the most upbeat and energetic person lately, and I found myself with little willpower. Scarcely enough to get out of bed in the morning, let alone find a laptop and blog about my bleh moods. Fortunately, this Eid break, things took a wonderful turn and I had a whimsical week! I'm honestly disappointed that it had to end. my newfound friends and I did not leave anything in Kuwait untouched. We did everything from Go-Karting, to The Big Bang Theory and Saw marathons, and drinking (non-alcoholic) Wine and Chardonay on the beach in the middle of the night. It was beautiful to (as much as possible in Kuwait) get in touch with nature and have fun without spending that much money.

Today, a taxi driver scared the living hell out of me first by telling me of my family, then offering me his grandson (who he explicitly described as more attractive than I). But he then went on to discuss how lame his life is because he threw his future away in his youth because he kept skipping school and spending time with friends he doesn't even remember anymore. I took his words to heart and came to terms with my failure in math 103. It's okay that I'm not as smart as I played myself out to be, and I should learn from my mistakes. Now I'm not commending failure, of course, but I'm okay with being human. Sometimes, I'm going to mess up badly (also I just hate math in general), but life only comes around once.

Now that my cheesefest is over, I can finally start my 10 minute informative speech on God knows what.

Meow

Well well. Look what the cat dragged in. A sleep deprived, yet happy to be alive Charah. Sugeeee.

University has been going great! I've never been so happy in my life. I'm the kind of person who's only happy when busy, and that's what university life has been offering. Between my courses, extra-curricular activities, healthy social life, and working out, I'm happy as a hippo. Are hippos happy? Whatever. Cool as a forgotten cucumber in the fridge drawer. There we go!

I joined the luxurious Corniche Club here in Kuwait and so far I was rudely escorted out of the Premiere lounge and into the basement to shower (which is still pretty foffy so whatever)and I lost the watch my cousins got me for my birthday. I haven't lost any weight (probably because I'm eating so much pasta), but I'm happy that I'm at least putting in the daily 1.5 hrs. It's fun working out, between you and me. I really enjoy jogging on the treadmill or doing circuit training. I actually look forward to that!

I'm looking for a really good camera to call my own. My parents keep losing their cameras and video cameras, so there are no extra ones laying around the house. Even if there were, my parents live on a whole different continent, so that's out of the question. I'm looking into some SLRs, because no camera I know will do justice. I want to capture moments like to exact colour of the moon and the texture of water. The only results my Crack Berry produces is a giant black pixel-y mass. That's freaking annoying!

Even though I'm studying to become an English teacher, I still have no idea what on earth MLA and APA formats are when citing a book. Isn't that Kureiji?

Suuperfun Happi Time!!!!!!!!!!

I have a penchant (pen.chant: a euphemism for obsession) for those little toys that you put in a bucket of water and watch them grow. So you can imagine my absolute mirth upon discovering a TOWEL (dude! awesome!) in that category. Behold.

I'm pretty sure the only reason I like them is because of the element of surprise. All other toys produce nothing and games always end the same way. With Suuperfun Happi Times (that's literally what they're called in Toronto's Chinatown), you never know what you're going to get! It could be a dinosaur, a spoon, and now, a towel! Legendary? I think so.

Today, I was given to submit an article to Bazaar Magazine through a friend, and I have just the article I've been saving for such an occasion. It's entitled What I Learned In Kindergarten and reading always makes me smile and remember how innocent children are, and the awkward phase they go through upon discovering the worm. It's like they're initially Adam Young of Owl City but evolve to Lil Wayne. It's a sad change, but we all make it.

Growing up is both fascinating and Kureiji. :)

Freshies

This morning, my mom insisted on riding along with me in a cab today to see me off for university. She patted my skirt and kissed my cheek and told me to be a good girl, and reminded me of that one day in junior kindergarten when my school called her and told her that I refused to take off my snowpants.

My first day of four years was a bit confusing... I felt so tiny! Even the skinny girls seemed bigger than me. Needless to say, I hid in the deepest corner of Starbucks with Tolstoy and pomegranate juice for 2 hours. I then scavenged courage cells from my innermost organs and went to Math 103, where I was delighted to discover that the professor was Canadian! It felt like a friendly wave from the universe because contrary to popular belief, there really aren't that many Canadians (and hardly any indigenous). The population of California is greater than that of America's hat. So you can only imagine the thrill we Candians get upon meeting a fellow hoser. :)

Lately I've been thinking of bringing popular Canadian restaurants and cafes to Kuwait, such as Bubble Tease and Tim Horton's, two things I've found it hard to live without. On a similar note, I'm passing around a petition to bring snow to Kuwait. Names would be helpful. :)

Kureiji country.

My Inspiration Isn't Money

My good friend Luqman Duale sent me a short movie (starring himself and a friend) about how his inspiration is something deeper than money. He's the guy who presents the money. I'm proud of you, Duale! ;)

You can view the short movie here, and don't forget to leave a comment! :)

Minimal

You know you're country's population is extremely small when this is a headline.

Kureiji stuff.

Gender Fender Bender

I don't get why all the women in movies have to be thin and attractive. Does a woman really have to look like this to destroy the world/save the day?

Do you have any idea how uncomfortable this looks? Wouldn't she be much more comfortable in sweatpants, for example? Or perhaps a looser shirt that would enable her to breathe? You know, it's okay for a woman to not be smoking hot in order to do some good/evil for society. Even if she wasn't smoking hot, she would be doing herself and her reputation a favour by dressing modestly. Would you honestly take Sonja Sotomayor seriosuly if she showed up for the first day on the job with her cleavage pouring out? Nuh-uh.

Now this. For God's sake, women, decide: you either fully cover your hair or not. There's no, 'oh but my bangs look really good today,' or, 'I just got these epic earrings..'. *sigh* Women bother me sometimes. Fake hijabis always aggravate me and make me say loud, snarky comments as they pass by me. I'm pretty mean sometimes xD

It's trivial being a female. I respect men because they're not over-the-top wild and obsessive when it comes to fashions and trends. Also, there's nothing easier than picking out a blouse and dress pants, not having to style hair in the mornings, not applying make-up, and not having to polish every single surface on one's body every single day. There's also nothing more attractve than a man in a suit. Just being honest...

Sushi is going out of fashion, apparently, and Lebanese is coming in. I couldn't care less, because I don't follow food trends. Does Hollywood have to dictate what we eat too? How about how we poop, how we should treat our parents, and the daily time alotted for nose-picking and such rudimentary needs?

Isn't that Kureiji?

PS: this post was inspired by Samia's Tacky and Cheap over at AboutQ8.com :)

Generic is Cool!

To all my readers: have a wonderful Eid filled with family, money, new clothes, hugs, kisses, knafeh, kharoof, and our mothers yelling at us to go to Eid prayers at 5 am.

Have a good one, guys!

Love,

Charah :)

ps: fasting's not over yet my little pretties. We still have 6 ayam el beed. Esteflo.

Yes, Let's Feed the Hermits

Meet the Intelligent Toilet, your one-stop hospital in a bathroom. This baby not only devours urine and feces, but it also analyzes urine, measures blood pressure, measures body temperature, measures visitor weights, and much more. Once it gathers up all this information, it sends it to your laptop or PC, whereupon it is emailed to your physician. It's a shame it doesn't also provide the user with medications and such. (You know, for health reasons ;) )

The inventor with too much time on his hands came up with the idea for the Intelligent Toilet when he saw the numerous amounts of people waiting for health check ups at hospitals. He wondered why people coudn't get their tests done at home (while they're pooping). He chose the toilet for a valid reason, though. Imagine your coffee maker or TV blaring out your weight and urine concentration every time you turned them on. It's a bit unnerving.

So now that you can get everything done at home, why leave it? You can order groceries over the phone, you can shop online or on TV, you can take online courses, and you can get a check up on the can. This is encouraging obesity and hermitism (I don't mean the Hellenistic Egyptian religion). But on the plus side, you won't have to leave your home and wait for hours for a doctor to stick needles in you to tell you that you're okay. All the Intelligent Toilet needs is a TV, a magazine rack, an Easy Bake oven, and we're in business.

Oh, did I mention that the Intelligent Toilet is Japanese?

How Kureiji are they?

Ayayayayaya

To be sure, I'm not an extremist Muslim. I'm just getting that out of the way before I become an...

EXTREME MUSLIM!

A few days back, my cousins and me went to the Grand Mosque in Kuwait to pray night prayers, as it is extremely rewarding to do so in the last 10 days of the Holy Month of Ramadan (wow, can I get any more biased?). I'm not going to lie, I usually get bored within the first hour of night prayers, but this time, I wanted it to last forever.

Imagine standing shoulder to shoulder with different men and women of different social statues and nationalities, all clothed in the same garb and all congregating for one reason: Islam. Imagine listening to the beautiful words of the Quran recited by the renowned Sheikh Mishary Rashid Al Afasy pentrate your soul. Imagine praying to your merciful, loving Lord and Creator outdoors with a playful cool breeze dancing about you as you lift your misty eyes to the limitless skies to thank Him, to beg his forgiviness, to ask for admittance into Heaven, peace, stregnth, success, health, love, happiness, and laughter. Imagine all the 150 000 people around all asking for the same things, and that's just in one small area. People all over the world are joined together by the mystical power of Islam laughing, loving, praying, hoping, and giving. It makes one feel part of something big and powerful.

That night, I prayed for non-belivers to feel just a quarter of what I felt. How could anyone accuse Muslims of being horrendous terrorists who want everything that doesn't have a 2 yard beard dead? How can they honestly delude themselves and their people into thinking that the noble Quran preaches murder, intolerance, and terrorism? Their ignorance blinds them and instead of looking into Islam and pondering its five pillars, Quran, and hadeeth, they would much rather fear that which they don't understand.

And that, my dear readers, is downright Kureiji.

ps: on a totally unrelated note, check out some other bloggers in the extended family: my uncle's wife JouJou Bean, and (get ready for this) my mother's mother's sister's daughter's husband's mother's brother's son, Yousef and co.!

Chuga Chuga

As frilly and feminine as I am, I have to admit to something: I sometimes wish I was a boy. Life is so much easier as a boy, and they are granted more privileges and freedoms than us girls. I've come to terms with that a long time ago, though, convincing myself that my parents simply loved me more than my brother and therefore gave him free reign whereas I was watched over and protected at all times. I belived myself more valuable than my brother. I was such a fool.... last year. :)

Ramadan 2010 is coming to a close. This is the first year that I prayed all my prayers on time and managed to finish a few chapters of the Holy Quran. Yet I can't help but feel that something is amiss. It's a hollowing, consuming feeling that is the source of most of my frustration (the other sources are redundancy in the media and writers' block). I am fairly disappointed with my lack of spirituality this year, but on the whole, isn't that what being a Muslim is about? Always wanting to reach further?

My laptop is still dead. I can't really afford to get it repaired right now, because it costs half of my monthly allowance (which will not be disclosed so stop fishing). My parents can't really keep a secret that well, because they keep telling me to borrow laptops and computers when I find myself desperate for one in the meantime, because I never know what might happen around my birthday. Thank you, King and Queen Obvious. And Prince Obvious while we're at it, because my brother keeps telling me to not buy a new laptop (for the record, I came out as HRH Princess Sarcasm). Oh well, I'll just go into hiding until a new laptop arives as a bundle of joy on my doorstep.... in December. On the 21st. I hope. I SWEAR.

This is going to be the fourth time I use a completely fictional, weird sickness as an excuse to not go to the salon with my cousins. 'Oh there's this weird fungal thing on my knee that hurts when I get my hair cut..'

Isn't that Kureiji? :)

Another Day

I live in Kuwait now. I love it! I love every second of it! I love the non-stop outings, the adventures, the thrill of walking down the street and counting how many times we get hit on, and how many cars follow us. The thing about Kuwait is that no matter how many times I wash my hair, the omnipresent smell of cigarettes and shisha is.... omnipresent. It gets me in trouble because people are forced to believe that I'm a smoker. Me. Me? Me! HA!

I'm starting university soon, and I have mixed feelings welling inside of me. I'm anxious, of course, and worried, but at the same time I'm excited and confident. See? Mixed feelings. My first class is math 103 at 1:00-1:50 PM. And that's it for the day. My courses include English 103 and 108, Political Science 101, Drama 102, Math 103, and Education 101. I'm also hoping to find a job because I much prefer to spend my own money so that the guilt of driving my father to the poorhouse is not on my shoulders. I won't be able to push it off onto my brother, either, because he works at McDonalds. HA! But no, a job is a job is a job. I want a fun one, though. It's okay to enjoy a job, right? Of course. And it's okay to make bundles of money for doing something you enjoy, right? Of course. What I'm getting at is.... I want a teaching job! It doesn't have to be something professional (I'm 16, I don't expect anything glamorous), but I don't want to be a bathroom janitor at Marina Mall, for example. A waitress at Maki is...acceptable.

Speaking of Maki, my cousin Dina expects me to meet her there by sunset to break our brooding fast and get rid of this almost electrical smell of our mouths.

Last night, not only were Dina and I playing Blackjack in Ramadan (sans gambling, of course), but we were cheating at Blackjack in Ramadan. Isn't that Kureiji?

Fool Proof

I often catch myself saying the following:

'What am I doing? WHY AM I LIKE THIS? I'm so weird!'

As often as.... 3 times a day? I like being a little bit off, though. It makes me feel like I boldly go places where no man has gone before. It's a small step for me, but one giant leap for man. Sound familiar? You have 10 seconds on the clock to Name That Quote!

Okayyy..I'm done now. I bring this up because I have an odd habit of mending a disagreement with my parents. It always works. I've been doing it for years now, and it's never failed me. Basically, when I'm upset, I make a series of loud noises, such as wailing, banging, breaking, a sigh of frustration, throwing plastic things at the mirror for a loud plink and various other irritating sounds. This will eventually lure my mother into my room where after ten minutes of conversation, crying, hugging, and laughing, I win. :) It's fool proof. Also, I'm the baby of the family so I can get away with it.

Last night I won myself a ticket to Kuwait for Thursday August 26th. Score? 74-3. I'm extremely excited to spend the last 10 days of Ramadan there, because it's always a wonderful experience going to the Masjid Al-Kabir, where Sheikh Rashid Al Afasy is blaring on the sound system. Islam is awesome.

People who put religion in a box are Kureiji morons. Just because you're religious, doesn't mean you have to check your common sense at the door!

Smart Mouths.

A Little Pick-Me-Up

This is a bit old, but it never fails to make me laugh. Enjoy!

Saturday Night Live's Census Parody ft. Fred Armisen

ps: I should mention that today is my father's 5oth. :)

Dil Dil Pakistan

Yesterday was Friday the 13th. Months that start on Sundays usually have Friday the 13ths. Whateverrrr, I'm not superstitious. I'm religious! ;)

I'm pretty bad at birthdays. I used to be so great with them, but now I feel like I've lost my touch. My brother's 19th birthday came and passed, and I haven't done a thing for him other than make him the subject of some ugly pictures. I feel pretty guilty, and I have to make up for it. Also, my lovely cousin Dina's 18th birthday passed, and I haven't given her anything even though she threw me a surprise party with a limo and the works. WHY DO I SUCK? My dad's 5oth birthday is next week, and my mom's 39th is the week after that. Please, lord, let me come into some money to make up for my birthday Grinchness.

I'm looking into starting a radio show when I move to Kuwait. It would be awesome, and I'm dying to do it. I would educate the Kuwaity taste in music, that I guarantee. Also, TV is overrated. The radio adds more mystery and I'm less likely to get in trouble for what I say if no one knows who I really am xD I plan on being the less annoying, less pessimistic, more attractive, and more intelligent Rush Limbaugh of Kuwaiti Radio. We'll see how this cookie crumbles.

Ramadan 1431 (or 2010) has commenced, and so far so good. I'm not really hungry this year. Well, last year I wasn't hungry at all because Dina and me cheated. We ordered Hardee's half an hour before sunrise, and slept until 5 p.m. or so, minutes before sunset. It was ridiculously non-spiritual, and we had to make up for a LOT of prayers. This year, I'm not cramming. The fact that we don't have any food at either house other than condensed milk, peanut butter, and spices that lived in boxes for a year now is helping. I'm not missing any prayers, my mom and me are doing an excellent job of unpacking, and our pool turned green from no chlorine. (RHYYYME!)

Recommendation: The Wish Maker by Ali Sethi, a young Pakistani author who shines a whole new light on growing up in Lahore, Pakistan. He tells the story of Zaki Shirazi, a boy growing with his mother, Zakia, his grandmother, Daadi, and his cousin, Samar. His father passed away in a PAF plane accident, leaving him the man of the house. We learn everyone's back stories and how they affect Zaki, and the Mississauga reference makes me squeal. It's an excellent read, and Ali presents a fresh style of writing, albeit it may initially seem as a bit ambiguous. It's what to read after The Kite Runner. Ali strengthens my want to go visit Pakistan in the near future.* I give The Wish Maker an 8/10.

It's 2:13 a.m. and I can't decide between drinking water now, or in 20 hours.

Isn't that Kureiji?

* I'm not talking about you, Sadiq, because you've yet to tell me how it's going! :)

My Preccccccccccciooouuuuuuss

I've been absent for a while, haven't I? That's because I kept trying to log in to Blogger but I kept spelling my name wrong and just realized it now. I feel so blonde.

On Sunday, I came back from a pleasant trip to Amman, Jordan. It was fantastic! We (my brother and me) stayed at my super-strict grandpa's place and snuck in late many times. It was awesome. We went paintballing on the mountains with cousins and friends (which I'm flipping awesome at, thanks to my heritage), dancing on another mountain, climbing old Roman coliseums, eating insane amounts of ice cream to beat the heat, and was a plain old teenager with my cousins. The ironic thing was that my brother and me went to Jordan to escape the Egyptian heat, only to find out that it was even hotter in Jordan, and there was no air conditioning. We could barely sleep without putting ice down our backs and taking cold showers. It was fun, though. I'd rather be uncomfortable but happy than comfortable and miserable.

Speaking of comfort, we finally moved to our villa. It's great, but my parents are peeved that we have no TV. We have TVs and everything, but we can't figure out how to hook up the satellites. My dad blew up something technical yesterday that somehow lead to all of us sleeping in my room. Eh, that's cool. I'm afraid of being alone anyway. Plus, the air conditioners are new and therefore emit odd wheezing sounds, sort of like Gollum laughing. It's too creepy to deal with on my own. I'm such a baby; and to think I'm going to university in a matter of weeks. Big steps, man.

I got Black Berry service for $5 a week. Tell me that isn't Kureiji!

Who Cares!

I'm pretty sure that no one reads my blog, so I'm free to say scandalous things (in my book, anyways) like period, boob and atheist. In case you non-readers of my officially scandalous blog noticed, I've been absent for a while. It's because I've been doing this:


Working and such. This was just a 2 hour break after I over-exerted myself shopping. Bless me, I was exhausted! Seriously, though, the reason I've been absent lately is because we're moving into our new house which is finally done, praise the Lord! We have been cleaning non-stop and unpacking like mad. It took me 3 days to sort out my parents' clothes, and I haven't even started on my dad's side yet! It's tiresome work, but I tend to change into pyjamas the second I arrive so I'm comfortable. I'd go there in pyjamas if the house wasn't still crammed with strange worker men who enjoy staring.

Tomorrow, I shall vanish off the face of the Internet (might as well be the Earth), because I'm going to Jordan for 10 days to see my cousins. It's just my brother and me, because my parents are busy with whatever it is they're doing. Also, Egypt is way too hot for a winter baby like yours truly, so I might as well skatamoosh into another desert, yes? I'm staying with my dreadfully ill grandfather, so that's going to be a new experience.

Today I got shampoo in my eyes and now there's this weird bump thing there. Je suis scared.

Isn't that Kureiji?

I Am What I Am

Sometimes things don't have to make sense for us to appreciate them. Why can't we just accept the fact that Darth Vader got thirsty while wading in the water? Must we humans over-analyze things?


It makes perfect sense! So what if they want to take their picture? It's up to them. They'll all remember were they were standing and I'm sure they're all painfully aware of their respective heights. I personally find it cute! Let them be.


Privacy is not a privilege, it's a right. Anyone who thinks otherwise is a poop.

Isn't that kureiji?

Watashi wa Nihon-deska!

LOL jk, I'm just lame!

Hana Yori Dango, the #1 hottest show to have ever blessed our television sets, has the power to make one feel (not to get all corny...) special. I don't know what it is about Jun Matsumoto's intense gaze, but it's like he's peering at my soul through my laptop screen and- whoa, I'm fangirling.

Let's get a few things straight: I do not care for Miley Die-rus, the Gonadless Brothers, or any other crappy, brain-melting show/movie/music/book that these fools at Disney can think of. When you sign a contract with Disney, you're basically selling your soul to the Devil in exchange for what everyone's after: fame and fortune. I have zero respect for them, and their blatant obviousness when it comes to plugs. This is not what good ol' Walt wanted his enterprise to become, I can guarantee it! The man who came up with innocent and classic characters, such as Mickey Mouse, Bambi, and Aurora did not want the MPAA to give his shows anything higher than a 'G' rating. Now everything on Disney is basically an 'R'.

Speaking of 'R' ratings, what's up with advertisements and the marketing industry these days? I mean, half the time, I'm confused. Am I buying a boob job or a cell phone? Am I buying lingerie, or a household cleaning product? Or, the all time Paris Hilton favourite, am I buying sex or a hamburger? Not only is someone's bare body the last thing I want to see as I step into Burger King, it's basically the last thing I want to see, period. I wouldn't blame them for running the ad on appropriate channels based on the demograph, but I really find it nothing short of downright offensive on a PA channel at noon when kids are watching their cartoons! It's disgusting, and almost Satanic! Not everything is about lust, people, give it up!

I'm suddenly in the mood for a burger xD

Isn't that Kureiji?

We're Not Talking About Aguilera

I have a habit of surfing MSN.com's travel section, and I came across this, the 50 Most Beautiful Things in the World list. As a Humanities minor, I have to disagree with some. My corrections are as follows:

2) Most Beautiful Island: They said this, I say this.
4) Most Beautiful Mountain Peak: They said this, I say this.
5) Most Beautiful Modern Painting: They said this, I say anything Dali can come up with.
6) Most Beautiful Bird: They said this, I say this.
7) Most Beautiful Statue: They said this, I say this. (no competition, are you kidding?)
12) Look, I'm not one to talk about cars, but I'm pretty sure that's not the most beautiful car EVER.
16) Most Beautiful Painting: They said this, I say give me a break you ignorant hippies, it's this.
17) The most beautiful woman is Venus (mythologically speaking), but they could have used a better representation.
25) Most Beautiful Tree: They said this, and I agree, but I also love this one.
35) Most Beautiful Book: They said this, I say pffft it's this.

37) Most Beautiful Fountain: They said this, I say this.
42) Most Beautiful Lake: They said this, I say this.
46) Most Beautiful Palace: They said this, I say this. (You should see the Dolmabache palace from inside... it's a breathtaking, tear-jerking wonder that doesn't get even a quarter of the attention it deserves.)
47) Most Beautiful Place of Worship: They said this, I say this.
48) Most Beautiful Library: They said this, I say this (concert hall, night, bird's eye view)

Lastly, The most beautiful thing according to me, this:





I love snow, yet I live in a desert.

Isn't that Kureiji?

That's So Hot.

I have a lot of friends and family members from around the world. I keep in touch with everyone, and I like to know how everyone's summers are going. In all my years of existing, I've never heard the following sentence coming from the lips of a CANADIAN:

'Man I'm glad to be in Egypt for the summer... it's just too hot in Canada!'

Needless to say, I burst out laughing for the succeeding twenty minutes. It was a great moment that my grandchildren will be informed of. Anyways, to those nagging Canadians, I gift you the following weather forecasts:
'It's hot in Canada!'

Isn't that Kureiji?

Hosers, Eh?

Disclaimer: If you are squeamish, do not click on the links for the Holocaust, Pakistan, Palestine, and Hiroshima. You have been warned.


You know what I love about Canada? Smoking is practically illegal. If you walk into an elevator smoking, chances are, this is going to happen to you.

Personally, I find smoking a disgusting habit. It's claimed the lives of many through both illness and death. It limits physical activity as well as brain stimulation, and sometimes staunches the blood flow to the heart. Heart attack anyone? Honestly, we're all taking in CO2 which is bad enough, did you want to add some tar, carbon monoxide, formaldehyde, ammonia, hydrogen cyanide, arsenic, DDT, and 591 other cancer-causing agents (carcinogens) to that? If smoking was a war, picture this: the horrors and atrocities of the Holocaust, the pain and misery of Hiroshima, the trials and sufferings of Pakistan, and the tragedies of Palestine all mixed together. That's smoking as a war. Now do you understand how awful it is, or should I introduce extended metaphors into the picture? Lastly, smoking is not sexy.

I could keep on going on and on and on about this topic, but I have a book list to complete.

Yup, I spend my summers trying to fill the void in my heart that Harry Potter has left me.

Isn't that Kureiji?

AHHHL;KDSLOPUA

http://www.mugglenet.com/trailer.php

Padre De Familia Americano!

You know your summer is going to suck when you've started watching all your favourite shows in Spanish (to improve, you see).

Today, my friend and I went to the beach by my building. She said she was going to come to my place at around 2 to change and we'll take a cab and go. Two came, and two went. Three came, and three went. Four came, and so did she. She then decided that she wanted to eat first, so I complied (I was really hungry). After eating, we went back to my place to change, and we went to the beach, whereupon learning that we needed VIP passes to get in. Her boyfriend magically appeared with a VIP pass, and we got in. Now, my parents are very strict, so they don't generally let me hang out with guys unless we're in a large group, and girls outnumber boys (unless it's family). My mom had a 'gut feeling' and she called to check on me. I don't like to lie to my mother, so I told her the truth. She freaked out at me and told me to come straight home.

Basically, I spent all day waiting around in my bathing suit, had a McSalad,went to the beach for literally half and hour where I stood awkwardly in the sand as my friend and her boyfriend did their thing, then got into a fight.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Shower of Tears

Congratulations to me, yes? I've finally graduated and I've never felt more relieved! I used to always have that nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach when I remembered that I still had exams to write until I graduated, and here I am! No more feelings in the pit of my stomach other than those nerves of anticipation and that really weird egg sandwich I had this morning disagreeing with me.

My graduation was a very cute affair. I wanted to have it at night, and everyone agreed. It was covered in baby lights, spotlights, and mirrors, for a truly mesmerizing effect. As valedictorian, I gave a speech which went on for longer than I thought. Apparently, it takes me 8 minutes to read three pages. Sometimes, I shock myself. All in all, my speech was great and I did hyperventilate to avoid crying, but, well...

I did the cliche cap tossing and such, then the ceremony was over, and I had my makeshift prom. I have a rather unusually small amount of classmates (0), so my prom was dancing a tango with a tenth grade girl. It was great fun nonetheless, and how many people can say that they had a graduation all to themselves? My poor brother graduated from high school in a totally different country, so only his girlfriend could come, but she brought her whole family to make up for his loneliness, and we were there via Skype. Poor boy, though...

And so beings summer. My plans? Sneaking off to the beach with three friends and one of their boyfriends. MY heart belongs to one out of the country, so, yeah. xD

Being melodramatic..

..Goodbyes.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Drool...

Brain Food. This is all I eat when I study, and I can't get enough of it!

PS: I finished both boxes within 3 days.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Bow Chicka Wow Woww

LOL.

I wonder what's on his iGrave playlist? It's probably stuff like Stairway to Hell, Gates of Heaven, Garden of Eden, and Run Joey Run. Movies? Deja-Vu. Or maybe Twilight, as punishment for every iPod that went dead and every MacBook that burned. Then maybe for his iNotes, he could read every gay Bill Gates/Steve Jobs fanfiction ever written. Serves you right, foo'!

I had time for just one little ramble before I had to get back to summarizing this book for Humanities.

Usually, I have a hard time shutting up.

Isn't that Kureiji?

We're Marchin' On

Well, it's that time of year when the chills are running up and down our spines, our hairs are standing on end, our nails have been bitten down to stubs, and it hurts to eat anything salty because we've been chewing the insides of our mouths in nervousness. On the plus side, we're burning our papers, cleaning out our knapsacks/lockers/desks/lunch bags, starching our shirts and dry cleaning our dresses. I'm really glad this is all ending soon.

Today was the promotion ceremony for the elementary and middle school. My Vice Principal called me last night and told me to show up at our British branch (that's half way to Italy!) in a black dress and heels. I was fine with that, no problem. But upon arrival this morning at 8:30, I was shoved on to stage with a program sans script, and a shrill voice in my ear piece telling me to make up a 5 minute speech about this school year, then improvise the rest of the 5-hour ceremony. Jesus. Thank God we had a debate class back in Freshman year and I'm sorta okay at impromptu junk. But please, next time, tell me before hand so I can pen something decent together, not 'I love each and every child for many different reasons: their creativity, diligence, assertiveness, curiosity, and all-round coolness.' Pft.

Yesterday we had the kids go swimming for a treat, and they loved it, especially when I raced the head of security. We all got sunburned, but I slathered them with aloe-vera gel. It was a wonderful time, and GOD I love them all to death.

Some people can't wait 'till the end of the year.

I dread it.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Rest In Peace, Dr G

Today, I have a serious post. It's a tribute to my beloved biology and chemistry teacher, as well as adviser and friend, Dr Galal, who passed away on Friday due to a doctor's mistake in his chemotherapy sessions.

Dr Galal was the only friend I had when I first moved here. I was bitter, miserable, lonely, and depressed, but he always found away to make me laugh. He made every situation 10x lighter and he made me look forward to going to school. He also helped me get over my initial insecurity of being around different people, and he helped me merge into the new, strange culture, yet maintain my own identity.

His death was a giant shock. I can't believe he's gone. Micheal Jackson's death was more realistic than this! To know that his spirit is not longer on this Earth is humbling. It reminds us all that death can come at any time and to any person. We don't know when we're going to die, and we have no way of stopping it when it does arrive. It's scary, yes, but we have to accept that this is, in the end, our fate. In this life, we are on the constant pursuit of material goods, but where will that get us? We won't be judged by how much money we made, how grand our mausoleums were, or what our taste in pop culture was. It's by how much good we did, how faithful, loyal, honest, pure, and true we were, and how we remembered God. Because you see, we can build, build, build, but this is where we end up in the end.

Live a virtuous life.

Wiki Wiki

No, I'm going to discuss Wikipedia, I was just expressing my lack in interest for the World Cup. Hehe :D

Yesterday was our long-anticipated International Day. Our Song started off great, but the foolish DJ decided that we didn't need the music anymore, and he turned it off. Naturally, all the kids got confused and didn't know what to do. I took the mic, and said the following words to the crowd:

'I apologize. Due to TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, we have to start over. Thank you for your kindness and patience.' I gave the DJ a pointed look, and he resolved to press the play button. Thank you, public embarrassment. :)

I was dressed as a Mexicastinian (cross between Mexican and Palestinian). I also yelled to the audience at large about the sufferings of the poor, innocent people of Pakistan. It was hard not to take me seriously with that checked Palestinian scarf wrapped around me. Word! I'm glad we got our message through, and I'm glad we're helping the world grasp the fact that one day, we might be the ones suffering, and there might be a Pakistani girl dressed as Mexicostine yelling at everyone to help out Gaza. Oh, wait, sorry, that's probably already happened a billion times, but since when does anyone give a damn about a country that's suffered for more than 50 years? 'Oh, it's ok, they're used to it by now. They don't actually expect us to help out, do they?'

Well I have 5 adopted siblings. I don't actually know them, but my dad did adopt them and helped them find refuge in a safe country. I love my dad. He's so kind and selfless. Just now he called to ask me which cereal I want (I'm addicted to cereal, so my mom doesn't buy it very often. She's away right now, so my dad's getting me as much as I want! :D)

Last night, at a fund-raising segment of the event, 4 6th graders pledged 500 pounds to pie me in the face.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Flame-Away

Whenever the school secretary is out (which is more often than not), I'm in charge of the front desk, manning the phones, delivering messages, calling parents, etc. I never fully appreciated how difficult a task it is: the secretary has to deal with more than the principal herself. She has to deal with sick children (and whatever oozes out of them), she has to take crap from angry parents, and she has to take orders from busy teachers. It's really not as menial a job as we all think it is. I salute you, Secretaries.

I finally finished the Hell part of my project, and it caught on fire last night. *Tip: don't put candles in a freshly spray painted box.* You could tell how used to my clumsiness my dad is when he just rolled his eyes when he saw a giant flaming mass in my hands. I wasn't looking at the box, I was looking behind me to close the screen door, when my dad sighs and tells me to put it out or something. Oh well, it looks better burned anyway!


It's supposed to represent my fear of loneliness (and I'm living in terror these days- I'm always alone!), but I felt so bad about putting something by itself, so I made another cardboard cutout and put it behind a flame so its not visible, but at least the Burning Girl is not alone. :) I did a mediocre spray painting job, and I accidentally sprayed my arm red. My dad thought I was bleeding and freaked out, and I kinda felt bad for laughing at him, because he cares.

What do you mean 'hormonal teenager'? Dads are the lachrymose ones!

Isn't that Kureiji?

Squee!

One kindergarten girl's dad is my dentist, and he has this strange habit of shaking my hand randomly in the midst of a discussion. It's a bit awkward and I'm caught off guard by it, but he acts like it's the most normal thing, next to breathing. It probably is, and he must find me strange for offering my hand before we launch into conversation. Excuse me.

While poking around the dregs and pits of news websites for something juicy, I came across this. SQUEE! I'm so excited for the release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, but at the same time it's the end of an era. As a child, my dad forced me to watch all those typical religious kids movies and read all those books from the 'home country' and such. My husband will probably do the same, but I'm also going to add to their burden and force them to read and watch Harry Potter, then we will have discussions, debates, arguments, games, and theme parties. I'm so looking forward to it! xD

Today I had to wipe off the sky blue nail polish from my scary-long fingernails, but there was blue residue all over my fingers. A lot of kids asked me where that was from, and I told them that it was a sickness correlating to not reading enough. The way the all ran to their classrooms to pick up books was the cutest thing I have ever seen! I'd feel guilty if I had told them that it was from not eating enough candy, but it was for a good cause, so no harm done.

My dad made a shrimp sandwich for me. I don't eat shrimp, so he told me to pick out the shrimp. What was left? Soggy, oil-soaked pita bread. Mmm.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Signs of Insanity

1) You are convinced that your future mother-in-law is watching you at all times. I'm not into anyone right now, but I can feel that faceless woman watching my every move, criticizing my every flaw and praising my every perfection (HA! NONE!). It's a bit of a chiller.

2) You speak to yourself both in your head and aloud. Yes, yes, this is very common, but you see, sometimes I'm a bit odd. Last night I was in bed having one of my mental conversations, when I suddenly choked on the Japanese word Itadakimas, which is what the Japanese say before they eat. I just had this sudden need to say it, and it came flying out. This is not the first time, I assure you.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. I have a giant mental block that's party due to my fascination with my new glue gun. It MELTS things!

Isn't that Kureiji?

Shoo Fly, Don't Bother Me

Dear Fly,
I'm not sure where exactly you came from, but I'm 100% sure that it's not clean. Even if you came from the Dettol factory, you would still manage to disgust me. Who invited you to drink from my cup of tea? To eat from my plate of rice balls? To rest in my clean hair? To buzz by my ear and make me have a spaz attack?

Fly, I don't blame you for your vulgarity and rudeness. You obviously came from the slums, because you have not been taught neither manner nor etiquette. You fly around from rotten vegetables, to garbage dumps, to horse manure, and finally land on my food. Really? Do I stomp around in poo then sit in your dinner? I don't think so. I have been raised properly. Not only that, but I have this thing called common sense (which is really not all that common). Duh. Acquire it, then come buzzing back into my room with an apology letter and a bouquet of freshly picked flowers from the King's Palace gardens.

In the meantime, when I attempt your murder, take that as a hint. ;)

Isn't that Kureiji?

How Not Kawaii.

I grew up watching Sailor Moon and I used to fantasize about being Sailor Sun (I actually did not know that she existed up until this point. Huh.). All the other girls were just fawning over Tuxedo Mask (pictured above), whereas I just couldn't get over his lameness. I always hated him. He was so gonadless to me. Firstly, who names themselves Tuxedo Mask? Are you high? Or was it one of those moments when YOU WERE HIGH? Secondly, which respectable 21-year-old man wears a tuxedo complete with a red cape and top had and white mask to save a 14-year-old girl in pigtails and a bathing suit? I love how he doesn't even save her. He comes in and throws a rose like it's a damn grenade, tells her something about how she is the only hope (way to add pressure, moron), stands there sparkling like some 20th century Japanese anime version of Edward, then vanishes like a complete coward who doesn't want to get his hands dirty. And finally, HOW DUMB IS HE? If he had an IQ remotely higher than, oh, I don't know, -84, he would know that Sailor Moon is Serena. See? Sailor Moon - Serena. Hello! Get a prescription mask, love, 'cause you're 99% blind. I left out the 1% 'cause he does know how to tie a bow tie. But other that, Naoko Takeuchi, I sentence you to 14 years of art class and Amazonian Syndrome treatment, because you quite obviously hate men.

I was clearly an Amazonian child..

Isn't that Kureiji?

It's Good to Be Japanese.

Because the Japanese have made our lives myriad times easier with their insanely useful inventions and innovations, they can get away with wasting their time with cruel, time wasting junk like this.

Bananas, Black Berries and Apples.

My BlackBerry screen randomly exploded. Well, I'm being melodramatic, but there is a giant crack right down the middle and it refuses to turn on. This is one of those times when I catch myself saying 'I wish I bought an iP-'. I then check myself in time before I say the rest of that word [-hone]. God forbid. Crossing over to the dark side like my evil brother... blasphemy! Instead, I say something along the lines of, 'I wish I got warantee.' xD

Today in Calculus, my teacher was trying to explain something about patterns. We just weren't getting it, so she decided to use an example involving the word 'banana' and the number '6115'. The end result? I was at least 60% more confused than I originally was. That's what you call a major fail.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Moi Je Joue

Can I interest you in some senior year? I've moved all my stuff and my mess into what used to be the security office. It is now Charah's Office, and you must make an appointment before you wish to see me. The nannies constantly refill my mug with tea, bring me supplies when I need them, and heat my lunch for me. Being in The Big Office is such an empowering feeling. Being called 'Miss Charah' at 16 isn't so bad either!

There's No Difference Between the Senior Class an the Senior Kindergarten Class

Our school is having an international day along with other international schools in the region. I've decided to compile yet another Wavin' Flags (1 2 3 4) remix. Had enough? Nope. I love my remix, but it took me forever to translate it into three different languages. It's worth it, though.

I'm spending the whooooooleee day eating imported bagels, drinking Lipton Clear Green, listening to iTunes, and colouring in flags. Senior year is awesome! NONE of my classmates showed up, so instead of sitting all alone in our classroom, I decided to sit in the security office in the lobby. I'm a loner sometimes xD

I have this Humanities end of the year project of creating my personal Heaven and Hell. For Hell, I've decided to depict the stereotypical fires, torture chambers, pits and whatnot, but instead of being completely surrounded with devils, I'm planning to depict myself alone. That is my personal hell: being 100% by myself with not even the Devil himself to hear me cry. On the other hand, my personal Heaven is going to have everyone I've ever known and loved, and more! It's going to be a cluttered mess of love, sanguinary joy, and positive feelings. I can't wait ti get started! In the meantime, I should get back to colouring my flags!

I hate anything that is not an oil pastel. I finished 5 markers on one flag.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Rabbit Rabbit!

Happy June! Oh Gosh I just love this month! It's that month in which we just play around, kick it into high gear for the exams, then graduate! Yaaay! Cheer! There's this Arabic song that's usually sung to brides about leaving their father's homes, but I tend to walk around singing it to myself for obvious reasons.

So today, I experienced RACISM. Well, a stupider form of it. I went to the grocery to get some missing ingredients to make oven fried chicken (mmm- healthy and good!) and I pretended not be able to read a price tag just to see what the two employees would say when I asked them how much a 2 pound ($0.4 CDN) pack of breadcrumbs was. Do you know what one employee said to the other? 'Tell her it's ten pounds.' Naturally, I freaked out in my HIGHLY accented Arabic and embarrassed the man to the point of no return. It was fun, but now I know that should I visit any place, I had better learn the language first! :)


Another thing that happened today was that the teachers had a meeting, and I was put in charge of alllllll the kids during lunch. They thought they could get away with things since there were absolutely no teachers on duty other than the lonely senior, but ohhhh boy were they wrong. They tried to get into fights, but by the time I got through with them, they were hugging each other. They tried to pants each other (GOD I hate that.. what a stupid idea!) but that was put to an end. Janitors tried to take the only soccer ball we had away, but that was resolved in a heart beat. By the end of the hour in which more events occurred, I was drenched in sweat from the heat and the merciless sun, my voice was hoarse and I resolved to using my beloved whistle, and all the older boys had developed a love/hate/respect relationship with me (it used to be just respect/hate, so we made progress). The best part? I loved every second of it!

I can't wait to become a teacher and have that established respect, and no bratty kids telling me that 'you're just a senior, Miss!'. Also, I want to part the kids in the hallways like Moses and the Red Sea.

Isn't that Kureiji?

[Insert Owl City Lyrics]

You might need to sit down for this one. I have a revelation to make. I am..human. GASP! I know. I'll give you a minute to let that sink in....
...Minute's over. Yeah, I thought we should get that out of the way before I move on to whatever.

I have small quirks and strange habits too, you know. For example, I will literally get out of bed at 3 am to fix my sheets. If they're not tight as spandex on a 130 kg woman, then I can't sleep. I think it's more of an OCD thing, y'know? I was in the (makeshift) kitchen earlier throwing together a (makeshift) dinner and I noticed that there was a lonely blue elastic band out of place with the yellow ones. I obviously had to locate more blue elastics in order for the blue one to not feel so lonely. Also, I lost a chopstick and that upsets me. I flipped the (makeshift) kitchen looking for it.

Where oh were have thou gone?
Have thee from my life withdrawn?

No, I'm not going to do this.

When I write an essay for school, I love writing it in the smallest possible font so that when I enlarge it, I've written much more than I thought. It's a pleasant surprise. I do enjoy being pleased. I enjoy extremely hot weather, or what I like to call a blow dryer day. I'm sure anyone who's been to the Mid-West knows what I'm talking about. I think I enjoy it because I spent so many years living in the Ice Age and I do rather enjoy change. Change is good, oddly enough.

Anyways, I have another essay to write. This time, it's a personal choice: an analyzing of Haruki Murakami's Kafka on the Shore. Too bad I hated the book. It drove me away from the edge.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Don't Feed Me Violins

Sometimes we're grateful for speedy time, other times our eyes strain trying to keep up with our watches. I think time is weird, to be honest. The days just d r a g by but the weeks areflyingby. It's nothing anyone can explain, so naturally, I'm going to ignore this... phenomena and move on to more pressing matters.

My graduation is coming up in....24 days (yeah I looked it up. Apparently, I can't use common sense. Today is May 31, and grad is on June 24th. Jeez.) and I'm completely mellow. I really fail to show stress or anger or fear. It's more of a butterfly festival feeling in the pit of my stomach (that feeling really bothers me, by the way). I can't wait to graduate and start the new, grown-up chapter in my life. I finally have an excuse to leave things behind (mental things) and move on. Movin' on up... Where is that song from? Whatever, I still have ADD.

Oh, well. 12 years and now it's down to one month. Where does the time fly? Once again, I refuse to answer. Too confusing for even this blond.

Isn't that Kureiji?

I Wanna Get Married... In 5 Years.

Last night I returned from a brilliant trip to Kuwait. It was my cousin's wedding, and Good Lord it was magnificent!

I was a bridesmaid along with 3 other cousins and we each had a gentleman to walk with. I originally was meant to walk with a good friend, but as it turns out, I was the tallest of us girls, so I had to walk at the back with my tallest male cousin (WHO IS RIDICULOUSLY STIFF!). Oh, well. We marched, we didn't get married or anything.

So the bridesmaid dresses were not particularly proper for a gallant wedding, so we went to change. We all wore long dresses with lots of tulle for puffiness, but I kept stumbling on my too-high heels and took them off 5 minutes into the wedding (now I could walk and dance with the original gentleman. He is, in truth, much taller than me. But 398429 inch heels to help a woman...). I spent all 5 hours prancing around and dancing my heart out barefoot, and I've never had so much fun in my life!

There's this ceremony in Arab weddings in which all the bachelorettes in the bride's family dance around the bride with giant candles, then the groom comes and turns off the candles one by one. I think it's a ceremonious thing, but I have no idea what it means. Also, the last bride gets to carry the largest candle to 'pass the torch' or whatever.

I tripped a lot barefoot, and at one point, I went into the wrong wedding hall. It was all good though, I checked myself in time. Also, a man went into the women's bathroom. I ran into him at the sink fixing his beard. I happened to be singing 'Come Primo' very loudly along wit the giant spear system, so that was pretty embarrassing. Thank God it wasn't this man my mother's trying to get me to marry, 'cause that would have put an end to the thought. I'm not a terribly good singer, you see. :)

In conclusion, I would like to be married in 5 years, please. Preferably to someone who drives an SUV or 4x4, or 4 wheel drive, whatever, I don't know the difference. Also, someone who gets my family, because frankly, I don't. For God's sake, we have a diseased DUCK hobbling around the living room!

Isn't that Kureiji?

Hi Eightus!

Yeah, that was just a witty was of typing hiatus. I am on hiatus. Hi, I ate us! Hiatus :)

One Angry Email Coming Right Up!

Today, I was doing my usual Googling (look up 'why can't I' in the search box. Never fails to please!) and I decided to cheer up one of my down friends by translating one of my ramblings in Urdu, only to discover that Google doesn't translate English text to Urdu! The outrage! Naturally, I sent one of my infamous (not really, I just send a lot) angry emails, and I've yet to get a reply. Hmph.

Well, this isn't the first time I've been a Good Samaritan (Bless my soul). On a recent vacation to Canada (I KNOW, please don't ask), I was shopping in this great store, Winners, when I found the perfume that I had been searching for for quite a while. I naturally bought it, but upon farther inspection of the package, I came across a sticker that said 'Property of Shoppers Drug Mart. If this product is being sold at another store, please call ---'. Naturally, being the Good Samaritan (God Bless me) I called this toll free number and tattled. It was fun. I didn't win any prizes, though, but the lovely Gentleman on the other end thanked me profusely, and he told me that I was the first person to EVER call. I was honoured. I'm the first Shoppers Drug Mart snitch. I feel like this. Media, I love you!

Anyways, sorry if any of the companies I told on or complained about got detention or something lame like that. Get over it. Back in the day (three years ago, really) I owned detention. I was in detention so much that I became detention monitor, just to save teachers the trouble of saying, 'Detention!' I once had this teacher who sneezed so much that I hung a sign at the edge of my desk that said 'BLESS YOU' in big bold letters. Every time she sneezed, we all just pointed to my desk. She once came to class with a big thank you sign. Good times.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Che un Bel Giorno per la Prima Colazione

Ahhhh, such a nice day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the mommies are yelling, the teenagers are hungry, the dads are praying, the mommies and teenagers are waiting, the San Stefano brunch is closing... ahh.

Last night, I dreamed that a good friend and I switched bodies. It was a bit like Freak Friday, except without the lameness. So we switched bodies, homes, families, everything, and it was going along fine, except when we had to brush our teeth. I had no idea which toothbrush to use, and vice-versa. For future reference, mine is the green one. Sometimes I do wish I could switch bodies with people. Don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly happy with the life I'm living, but swapping would be a welcome change as well as a challenge. Maybe sometime in the next century, it will be invented. It would be like one of those 'How Much Do You Know About Your Best Friend' game shows. I'm sure it would cost a myriad amount of money, but, eh. It's worth it.

You know what gets me thinking sometimes? Now don't get me wrong, I don't question the dogma of my beautiful religion, but I do wonder about reincarnation. You know, we could have lived in another time, but we would never know 'cause we don't remember it. I mean, for all I know, I could have been Hitler or James Brown (it's a gender pattern, you see. Male, female, asexual. Male, female, asexual). I don't believe in reincarnation, though, not only because it's not mentioned in my religion, but because it doesn't make sense. Everyone gets one turn, the end. Badda Bing Badda Boom. The end.

In other news, I can fit a whole pack of gum in my mouth at once. Jaw ache? Oh God yes.

Isn't that Kureiji?

Hello, I'm A Box.

*Dramatic Exhale* Whoa. I am POOPED. I've resembled a lost chicken today, what with all my running around, desperately looking for things all over this scrambled city. I have so many errands to run, I really don't have time to breathe. I also don't have space to breathe...

I've been living in a furnished apartment for the past few years now, and it's finally time to move away. Only, I have to move to two places. I have serious packing to do, as well as serious explaining to the owners of this apartment. You see, I like to turn what little space I have into my personal sanctuary. I tend to draw all over walls and put up posters, pictures, LOADS of countdowns and calendars, and a lot of other knick-knacks. It's pretty cozy, if you're me, and you like the Hogwarts gang staring down at you as you slumber.

I've taken most of the luggage and all the water-boxes and filled them with stuff, from Happy Bunny folders to vibrating massage devices. It's loads of fun, looking to see what's accumulated under my bed since I first moved in. I found a shirt, perfume, LOTS of erasers, the chain of a ring-and-chain necklace given to me by a lovely friend, books, lost homework, lost iPod speakers that I thought I left in Tunisia last year, and an earring. Can you imagine? What if I lived here for 5 years? I'm sure I'd find my brother there, among animals and food. Ew, never.

I enjoy cleaning all around. It's fun, refreshing, and a BIG stress reliever. On the other hand, I'm pretty disorganized, messy, and lazy sometimes. I'm like two people in one. Zeus forgot to get to me..

Isn't that Kureiji?

ps: I couldn't find the actual Wikipedia page or reliable source for that quote, but, eh.

Homer Ain't Got Nuttin On Me.

I have this annoying habit of telling myself and everyone around me that this is the last time we will ever experience Tuesday, May 18th, 2010, 6:30 PM. Yup. Just mull that over while enjoying a Contemplation Candy.

I'm such a junk-a-holic. I literally cannot survive without instant foods, or anything that I don't have to prepare. It's just easy, though not really satisfying. I love coming home to a batch of hot popcorn or Michelina's Mac&Cheese. As a senior, I real don't have time to stand around in the kitchen cooking up a storm, which is why I love Percy Spencer, inventor of the common-day microwave oven. Also, thanks to the chocolate bar in his pocket that melted, sparking the whole 'holy crap I'm gonna be rich off physics' thing. I make Homer Simpson look like a bikini model compared to all the junk I devour.

...

Alright fine. I'm open about my eating habits because I stopped being such a junk junkie. I'm eating (relatively - I'm still a teenager!) healthy, like all the food groups and whatnot, and I do have an exercise regime to keep in shape and all that jazz. But it's fun to pig out every once in a while, such as during my weekly viewing of Harry Potter. Once a week, though, not every day like it used to be. My school cut our ordering in privileges, and raised the prices on cafeteria food.

This is starting to sound like such a weight loss blog, but it isn't. It's a blog, the end.

ps: one of my friends thought double spacing and essay meant hitting the space bar twice after every word.

Isn't that Kureiji?